I was talking with one of my close friends about this recently, and I realized it would be a good thing to write about because I'm sure there are many of you who can relate to what I'm about to say.
Honestly, for me, confidence and self-esteem have been a daily battle for years. Even now as a fully fledged adult, I still struggle with having confidence in my decisions because I care way too much what people think about me. I'm sure many of you can relate. But why is this such a common battle?
Let's take a look at the world we live in today. I think one of the most prevalent characteristics of the world we live in in technology. We have so much information at our fingertips. With the press of a button, we can know all sorts of things! Not to mention the boom of social media. Even 20 years ago, social media really wasn't a thing. But now, we have texting, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, Pinterest, Blogger, and many other popular websites and platforms. In many ways, it's a good thing. For me, I use Facebook to keep up on big things happening in people's lives like starting a new job or college, getting and engaged married, having a baby, going on exotic trips, etc. It also helps me keep in contact with friends and family I don't get to see very often, like my extended family that live all over, my college friends, and people I met on my mission. Without social media, it would be difficult to keep in contact with those important people in my life. In that aspect, social media is a wonderful thing!
But there's also the flip side of the coin when it comes to social media. I've found (and I'm completely guilty of this too) that we tend to publicize an "ideal version" of ourselves. Only the best pictures make it onto our FB and Instagram profiles. Only the best news and life events make it into our posts. While I'm definitely seeing more people who have the courage to post when life isn't going perfectly, and I applaud you for doing so, putting up a "perfect facade" is still a very common pattern I'm seeing. But like I said, I'm completely guilty of this too! When I'm struggling, I have the tendency of shutting people out and trying to deal with my problems myself. I'm definitely trying to get better at that, and I've seen some improvement, but it's still a work in progress! The idea of posting on social media when I'm struggling is a scary notion to me! And I'm definitely not saying that we should publicize everything we're going through, because some things are just too personal, and there are other ways to reach out to people for support.
All I'm saying is that I've also found that people generally respond best to genuineness. When we're truly being ourselves, people respect and admire that. They feel more comfortable around us. When we take the leap and choose to be ourselves, then we give other people the opportunity to let their guard down too. I've really tried to let my guard down through this blog. While I definitely don't share everything in my personal life, I've found a lot of support through this! And it's because I try to be real in my posts.
When I see someone post something real on social media, I can just tell that they're being genuine. We each have the innate intuition within us that can help us discern between when people are being real, or when they're hiding behind a mask. I respond to the FB posts that are touching to me, that make me feel something like excitement, sympathy, or enlightenment.
While these types of things don't often make it onto my wall, I know that there are tons of things circulating out there that communicate unrealistic expectations. An easy example to use is magazine-front-cover models. They may seem like they have "all that," but what kind of lives do they lead? How often do you think they experience true joy? And what kind of messages are they sending? That a woman's worth lies only in her outward appearance? I'm not saying that looks don't matter, because they do, but they aren't the only reason we women are of worth, despite what the Clinique and Victoria's Secret ads may say (and not say). What happened to virtue, to modesty in dress, to the inner "glow" a woman can have when she is assured of herself and her worth?
I think every human being has one desire in common: each of us want to be treated like normal people.
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