Transitions in Life

I've been thinking about this quite a bit lately. I mean, it makes sense, now that I've graduated from my college studies and am stepping into the next phase of my life, whatever that may be.

I graduated high school 6.5 years ago, which was a major life transition. It marked the beginning of my independent adult life. It meant leaving my beloved hometown, my family, and all familiarity as I embarked on to the small college town of Rexburg, Idaho, to discover what I wanted to do with my life and who I wanted to become. It was definitely scary at first, especially since I was the first in my immediate family to go to BYU-Idaho, and the only person I knew going up there up there was my roommate. But it didn't take me long to fall in love with the college life, deciding for myself what degree to choose, what classes to take and when, what social activities I wanted to be a part of, and more. I grew SO much throughout my time in college.

After a year of school, I made the decision to serve a full-time mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which is something I never had the desire to do before. But that decision was completely my own. And yes, that was a scary thing too at first! The idea of going to a completely different continent and country, learning a new language, and sharing a different gospel message in a predominantly Catholic city of 10 million people of varying socioeconomic statuses was certainly intimidating! But, once again, it didn't take long for me to fall in love with life as a missionary, sharing a message of hope and love, and becoming fluent in Spanish miraculously quickly (I felt confident speaking after only 6 months).

The missionary life was absolutely wonderful. It was definitely hard at first, and there were many frustrating days, but it just took some time for me to adjust to my "new normal," if you will. Coming home from my mission was no different. It was difficult at first to adjust to speaking English again (my family can attest to this), although adjusting to carpeted floors and hot showers didn't take very long ;) But getting back on social media was definitely an adjustment too. On my mission, I got used to sharing a Nokia brick phone, not even having texting most of the time, video calling twice a year, and using a computer for just an hour and a half per week to email my family and friends. Going from that to getting back on Facebook, texting again, Messenger, having my own computer and 1st smartphone, etc. definitely took some getting used to! And now look at me, I have my own blog now! :) I'd say my transition from the mission back to normal life was the last life transition I experienced before now.

This life transition from "college independent adult life" to "real independent adult life" is particularly unique. In my opinion, college is definitely independent, but at the same time, everything is so structured. Once you're set in a degree, you know which classes you need to take, and housing is basically provided for you - you just have to choose which place you like best. You're still choosing for yourself, but your options are all laid out for you. I didn't realize that until recently.

This "real independent adult life" that I'm transitioning into is a different kind of independence than college is. I do have options, but I have to go find them. I may be student teaching through BYU-Idaho, and everything there is structured for me, but I still have to find where I'm going to live. And after student teaching, that's when the real independence is going to come. I have to get my teaching license, decide which teaching job to take, where I'm going to be, and all those other things. And that's definitely scary and intimidating! But life from this point on is going to be like this. My life is going to result from my decisions. Decisions truly do determine destiny, to paraphrase Thomas S. Monson.

Though these life transitions have all been scary at first, I know that my Heavenly Father has been there with me every step of the way. I'm never alone, even when I feel like I am, because He is always watching. I know that He knows me better than I know myself, He's aware of what's going on in my life, and He knows what's best for me. He won't ever force me to do anything. I still have my agency, or my freedom to choose. He can only lead and guide, if I will let Him.

This student teaching is a little scary, I'm not gonna lie. I'm going to a completely unfamiliar place, once again not knowing anyone, and I'll be teaching an age group I've never done before. But I know that this is going to be a great experience because of all the past life transitions that have prepared me for this moment. I may be going by myself, but I'm never going to be alone. I'll have colleagues, new friends to find, my Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ, and of course my ever-supportive family and friends wherever they may be found. I know I couldn't do this without you all. Thank you for supporting me in everything I do. I'm excited to see where this new adventure takes me, and to see how "real" independent life suits me. I've been preparing for this my entire life, and now it's finally here!

To My Man

Dear Mr. Right,

I know you’re out there. I know that you’re real. I know that our paths will cross someday, when the time is right. I know that you will be the right man for me in every way. I know that you’ll be a righteous son of God, and that you’ll put the needs of others ahead of your own. I know that you’ll make me want to be a better person. I know that you will be the father of my children. I know that we’ll be sealed for time and for all eternity in one of the Lord’s holy temples (personally, I hope it’s the Portland temple). I know that I will be happy as your eternal companion.

But, I don’t know who you are. I don’t know your name. I don’t know how old you are. I don’t know where you are. I don’t know what you look like. I don’t know when our paths will cross. I don’t know how hard it may be to find you. I don’t know how many more heartaches I will have to endure before I find you. I don’t know the contents of your basket of trials. I don’t know what secrets you keep. I don’t know what makes you tick, what makes you happy, what makes you sad, or what the future holds for you. I don’t know what you’re studying. I don’t know if I’m going to put you through school. I don’t know if I’ll need to find a teaching job right off the bat. I don’t know where we’re going to live. I don’t know how soon we’ll start having children after getting married. I don’t know how many children we’ll have. I don’t know what trials we’ll face as a couple. I don’t yet know the successes, the meaningful moments, the stolen kisses, the laughter, the comforting, the dancing in the kitchen, or the quiet moments of warm embraces we’ll share with each other. But I do know that whatever we face, we’ll face it together.

Come find me. Find me in one of my classes, or at ballroom night, or in my ward, or at a game night, or randomly in the Crossroads cafeteria, or in Ogden, or wherever it may be. Come to know me for who I am, all character flaws included. Come break down the walls around my heart. Come take my hand, be there for me when I need you, and hold me together when I’m falling apart. Be patient with me. Please don’t give up on me. I promise that it will be worth it. I also promise with all my heart that I will do the same for you.

I will be your rock when you feel unsteady. I will be your comforter when you need to be heard. I will make sure that you never feel alone. I will celebrate your successes with you, and love you even when you stumble and fall – in fact, I’ll love you even more when you do. I will support you in all your endeavors. I will be proud to call you mine. I will be proud to wear your ring. I will be proud to bear your name. I will be proud to bear our children. With our Father’s help, I will strive to be the best wife and mother I can be. I will enjoy every moment we get to share together. I will live up to the covenants I’ll make with you and Father so that we can enjoy eternal life together.

So what are you waiting for? Come find me. I’m waiting for you. Know that you are in my thoughts, dreams, and prayers.

All my love, until the day we finally meet,

Jessica Romrell